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St. Cloud State University
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You are not alone
By Debbie Peterson
Published:
Monday, October 21, 2002
Debbie Peterson -- Guest Column
Through the past couple of years I have spoken with and gotten to know many different people, and have been fortunate enough to experience some conversations that have opened my eyes to the various different opinions and perspectives that exist on life. Because of this, I have also listened to many tales of life experiences, and by comparing many of these stories I have come to see that there is one thing that every human being has in common. Somewhere along the way, each of us is going to suffer, each of us is going to face something that will bring us down, and it is very possible that each of us will have to deal with some form of depression.
College students are far from immune. Obstacles are: new pressures, college level courses, a different social atmosphere, distance from family and loved ones and a stronger focus on self dependence.
I want people to realize that they are not alone in their problems, nobody has a perfect life. If you are facing your own difficulties and think that no one else would understand, I need to very strongly express how wrong that assumption is. Distancing yourself from others when you are dealing with a problem will not help you; talking over your feelings with others who care will. I have personally faced two divorces in my immediate family, and there was a time when I thought that nothing else could be worse. Yet, there are many other people out there who have been through just as much as I have, if not more. It is impractical to think that the normal family is perfect. It is not how bad the problem is but how the problem is dealt with that determines the strength of a family or an individual person.
It is very important to learn to deal with conflicts and gain the ability to pace yourself outside of the emotional aspects of the situation, looking at it with perspective. By an overall perspective, I mean the mindset and understanding that life will continue after the conflict. Once a person is capable of assessing the situation calmly and recognizing what steps should be taken to fix the problem, the crisis can be fixed. Individual hardships are not the end of the world, even though it feels that way at the time. If you have the ability to realize that hardships can be overcome, then you are a strong person and you have what it takes to lead a happy and successful life.
College may be stressful, but stress is a guarantee in life; it is not going to go away once you graduate. The sooner a person learns how to deal with hardships, stress, or depression, the sooner they will be able to overcome the occasional stumbling blocks that will come along, leaving more time to actually enjoy life.
